You're Never Too Old to Learn.

The classic term "you can't teach an old dog new tricks" is one of the many incorrect ideas floating around these days. First off, in a literal sense, you can teach a old dog new tricks. My dog is headed towards 8 years old and regularly learns new tricks. In fact, I should pick up a trick book and see just how many I can teach him in the coming year. Granted, it's far easier to teach a puppy not to pee in the house, how to sit, how to walk on a leash, how to shake a paw. They're basically sponges (albeit incredibly high energy sponges that never sit still) when their young. But they certainly don't suddenly become stupid or lose the ability to learn something new as they get older.

The same is true for human. The rate at which young children learn is absolutely remarkable. They pick up every little thing with seeming ease. You've probably heard of children learning music or languages without even thinking about it. Why, then, is it so much more difficult to process that information as an adult? Because over time our neurons stop multiplying at superhuman rates of speed, creating new neural pathways in our brains for every single thing we learn. We still form new neural pathways as we learn a new skill (mental or physical skills alike), just no where near as quickly.

You really just have to figure out how you learn best... no matter your age. Maybe you learn through auditory means (being told, listening, explanation, you get the drift), or perhaps you learn by reading. Both of these fall under the category of 'linguistic' learning. You learn through language. That doesn't necessarily mean you learn languages faster than others, though you may if you understand the basic structures of the language already. Other people learn through physically performing a task, like taking apart a clock and putting it back together (who needs instruction manuals anyways?). There are a few other learning styles as well, just google it and see which one sounds most like you.

So you've wanted to learn something your entire life, or perhaps you've just discovered a new interest. You might think you're too old to learn, but you're not. Don't be discouraged if you struggle for a little while... it's not always going to be easy. If it were, it wouldn't really be much in the way of 'learning', would it? It's my belief that some of the most worth-while things are those which do not come easy to us. The feeling of accomplishment that you get after you conquer something that posed a real challenge to you is incredible.

So do you want to learn to play an instrument? Speak another language? Dance? Paint? Carve wood? Design websites? What ever it is, just take a chance and start learning now... not in a year, not in a decade, now. There is ample psychology research into the area, and not only does it show that learning doesn't stop with age, it also suggests that those who continue to learn remain more agile of mine, and in better physical condition (if you're learning dance, for example). In other words, those who continue to learn new things age better than those who do not, even if it's not a life-changing amount. What will be life changing, though, is following through with a dream and not having regret for the rest of your life. I know taking on something new, following a dream, or learning again can be very intimidating. In fact, it can be down-right terrifying, but so are a lot of things in life (you know... falling in love, living alone for the first time, new jobs, big moves... the usual), so why let that stop you from following those dreams? There's no reason why you can't, I don't care how old you are, you really have no excuse. Go learn something new!

Why musicians of today suck.

You’ll hear teenaged music enthusiasts around North America complain that so-and-so (pick any band popular today) sucks. Inspired by their favourite bands and musicians to learn to play the instrument of their choice (guitar for me), teenagers suddenly become the know-alls of the music world. They complain about how the members of this band (or that band... pick a card, any card ;) ) can’t even play the instrument they advertise themselves to play. The lead guitarist is weak, playing the same old lines that have been played for decades, merely changing an octave to make the song sound different than their previous hit. The rhythmic guitarist can’t hold a decent riff. The drummer has less sense of rhythm than a guy who can’t dance. The bassist plays the simplest lines, with the volume so low that the sound is lost in the chaos of the junk music it’s supposed to support. The lead vocalist can’t hold a note to save his life. Blah blah blah. Good for you, you can hear the rhythmic issues in a song. Perhaps you can also tell instantly who a new song is by, because (like a certain Canadian band that must be very fond of coinage) every damned song sounds exactly the same. Congratulations, you know nothing of the music business.

To know music is not to know the music business. One would think, certainly it’s common sense, that the two would be intertwined indefinitely. Unfortunately, this is not the case. You see, it has become entirely possible to become ‘famous’ for anyone, even those without talent. The days of talented guitarists, bassists, drummers, and singers have passed and we’re left with the undeniably popular crap of today. You see, people, as a whole, know nothing (or next to nothing anyways) about music. The average person with the radio cranked up as they drive to work in the morning doesn’t give a flying you-know-what about acoustics, melody, or harmony. They don’t care if the lead guitarist has a wicked 25 second solo in the middle of the song, or if the bridge flows aesthetically into the chorus. They honestly couldn’t care less what level of talent the individual musicians have. They merely want entertainment. People are different and yet so very much alike when it comes to music. There are a few types of people. There are you know-all self-proclaimed musicians out there that listen for aesthetically pleasing melodies, harmonies, riffs, solo’s, blending, distortion, beat, count, octaves, tune, notes, flow, hammering on, hammering off, high-low combinations, finger plucking vs. plastic plectrums vs. metal ones, can tell the difference between a soft, medium, and hard plectrums simply by listening, and care what make of guitar the dude is playing. There are those that listen for the lyrics alone, and couldn’t care less about the musical abilities of those performing the song, only expecting to feel something through the lyrics they take in. There are those that disregard lyrics altogether and just want a beat, usually the beat that is the simplest, that they can tap their toes to or bob their head along (*cough*mother*cough*). There are those that are tone-deaf and really can’t tell the difference between good and bad singing, and there are those that just like the song for how it makes them feel, period... perhaps it’s connected to some moment in their life, like a wedding, high school prom, or a favourite commercial for all I care, and it just reminds them of a time in their life that they enjoyed.

You look at those five groups and you know-alls will think you’re clearly the superior group. You look at it from the music world, from the perspective of a company executive, and you lot are the ones that get tossed under the bus. And this is where you’re ignorant to the music world. The music world is not about talent, it’s about money. The corporations look at the population as a whole and sees that the vast majority of people don’t care about a musician’s technical abilities. And so they don’t care. There is a band out there in the ‘popular culture’ world that immense numbers of people like, and the corporations see dollar signs. When a band comes in that is similar to that band, the little green dollar signs are floating around the exec’s heads, as their pupils change like a slot machine. Those record company executives can smell money from a mile away, and they will stop at nothing to keep their own personal economy running on high.

Now you smartass musicians in your little bands that are doing decently on the local scene think you can ‘make it big’ in the pop-culture universe. Come on, admit it... you’ve got plans of how you’re going to record a kick-ass demo and mail it out to all the big companies... Universal, Warner, Sony, Virgin, . Or maybe you’re one of those purists that doesn’t want to be part of that corporate trash you bitch about on a daily basis. In that case, you’re sending out to indie labels, many of which are actually run under one of those major labels I just listed. And here’s what you don’t want to hear... you don’t stand a chance at ‘making it big’. The major labels don’t want you because you don’t fit their standard cut out version of music... you’re too big of a risk for them. If they sign your band and no one buys your album, they’re out of a load of money, and you eventually get dropped. Unfortunately for you, you end up in debt to the company. I bet you didn’t know that the company doesn’t pay for those music videos, tours (busses included), recording studios, production and distribution. They lend you the money for those things, and then once your album starts selling and your tour sells out, they take that money out of what you’ve made. So let’s say your first album is out, and you do well. Guess what? You still haven’t got a dime to your name because that bloody corporation soaked you for most of it... you wanted that extravagant video, now you’ve got to pay for it. On the other hand, let’s say you manage to get signed to a major label, and they don’t force you to change your sound to fit the standard carbon copy style, and you somehow, surprisingly, don’t do well in sales. You’ve borrowed the money from the label to record your album, market it, make a sweet music video, and head out on tour, but you find that your sales have bombed, and the label drops you from its roster. You, my friend, have made no money, and now have to pay back that money that the label seemingly gave to you. Do I hear bankruptcy in your future? Ohhhh yes.

Perhaps you’ll get signed to an indie label that really liked your individuality and attention to detail. Unfortunately there is little money behind indie labels, and as such, you work much harder and often get nowhere in return. Your music videos are of lower quality and have fewer spectacular elements. The recording equipment isn’t as expensive, and you tour in a van you bought with your own money instead of a lavish tour bus. Marketing is less intensive, so sales are low, and your tours may never sell out. But you’re happy, because you’re making quality music, your way. Eventually you’ll give it up because there’s no money in it.

So feel free to complain about the quality of music today. But remember, everything that is ‘popular culture’ is run by those that are fuelled by greed. The music business is not about music, it’s about money. You may have more talent, but no one really cares what you think. You are the disposable audience... the execs will gladly sacrifice a few of you to gain the rest of the population’s approval. Thanks for staying true to music, but money makes the world go ‘round.